I am considering deleting this blog because, though I know how important it is to have an outlet or I’ll just spin apart, and that’s true for anyone, I am wondering if this is the best way for me to do that? We live in a very sad world these days and I feel that my posts don’t particularly do very much, if anything to add positivity to the lives of those of you who have chosen to follow and read the record of my life so-to-speak?
My intention was to try to reach out in the pain that I often feel and hope to find that I’m not alone and that has been accomplished. After reaching out as I look back over the last few years, I wonder if I have just been spinning my wheels in a manner of speaking and I feel that the answer is a resounding yes. So now what? Well, I honestly don’t know and though there are times when I feel that I am on a precipice of some great change, I don’t know what that change is because I am fearful of leaping off into oblivion and I wonder if it’s the fear that is holding me prisoner?
As you will remember, I have gone skydiving a few times and though I felt a sense of trepidation just before making the jump, the truth is that I obviously survived it but this is quite a bit different I suppose.
all I know is that if I were someone else reading this blog, I’d probably want to beat some sense into this person and say “get your shit together and stop moaning about everything, who wants to read that, especially in today’s world, fuck this shit”.
I can’t pretend that I know what goes through the mind of those of you who read and comment but I would guess that after a while of reading, it’s like a broken record and you’d want to push the needle out of that one groove, to encourage something different to occur.
I do appreciate all of you who have read my posts over the past few years and those of you who have liked and commented and I feel that I have made a few valuable connections.
I don’t know if this is the end of the blog as I am considering its removal and often, with me, consideration can take a bit of time, after all, I’m not the most decisive person, and there are people in my life who can attest to this.
at this point, I just wanted to say thank you for your interactions, comments in the form of either observations or advice and for your friendship.