another weekend of the absentee mother

this weekend the wife is finishing up laying the floor on the second story and she’s working for her client that she claims will never let her quit.

The children and I went to the park twice yesterday and I wished I haven’t come home between park times. Here’s what happened.

They were playing in the back yard and I heard the little boy starting to cry like his sister was picking on him, which is normal. I try to let them work it out because they have to learn how to do that so when he came in crying and shut the door, I figured that it was alright because at least they were separated. After a couple of minutes, I heard the little girl trying to come in and I realized that the little boy had lock his sister out of the house, something we both told him is not okay.

I unlocked the door and his sister said that he had locked her out.

Without thinking, which I know that I’m not the best as, I gave him a small spank on the bottom and told him that he’s not supposed to lock his sister out of the house.

Just after that, the wife says from upstairs, "You realized what just happened don’t you? He was trying to protect himself from his sister the only way he knows how and you told him it’s not okay. That’s the message he got".

I’m still pissed off about that and when I call the little boy and he doesn’t answer me so I have to yell a little louder because I don’t always know where he is, all she does is yell back at him "answer your daddy".

She’s going to have surgery in a week and a half to remove a bone spur that she’s had since she was 17. It took her years of pain before she actually decided to see the doctor about it so after her surgery, they told her that she won’t be fully recovered for 6 months to a year. that means no working on the house or working in the yard and she says "it’ll be interesting to have a year where I just focus on myself" and I thought internally "what will she discover"?

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7 thoughts on “another weekend of the absentee mother

  1. There are no words. May i throat punch her-or better yet, can i smack het with a metal folding chair?! Gawd the selfishness she exudes AND the lack of parental involvement.. I really want to beat the shit out of her. Kids are beautiful gifts and all shes fucking concerned about is the fucking house…
    Did you find the root of the locked door incident?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Focus on herself is pretty funny! I gotta point out though that he did come in to protect himself and then got spanked by you, so…. hahaha on him… Talking to the girl alone is best bet. And yeah, yelling from other rooms is not. Go to her room sit on bed dole out punishments for disobedience.(s). (And then sticking to them which is impossible in your house, I realize. ) Make smaller commitments you can commit to, like no talking (silence ban from you by you – you won’t be speaking for three hours and they have to figure out what you are thinking HAHA!!! that’s a reward for you and a punishment for them! IF you hear the boy complain , the girl is picking on, she loses her phone privilege til this time tomorrow – and in her room alone if she can’t get along with/ play with brother. SHe’ll throw a fit and it’ll be hectic for a day…. but allow it. THe burn and sting of anger yelling and screaming in her room will wear her out, she needs a good cry… pent up anger and frustration – crying is the best ! Plus she’s a girl so she needs a good cry. and if she’s anger with her brother, she needs to be stuck in her room punching a pillow and she will be healthy and tired and relaxed after an angry 8 hour cry / scream session. Hold the phone in your closet – up high, hide it. Let her look. Let her tear up the house looking . Tomorrow when she’s calm, she has to clean the house (her tear up). But let her throw a fit if you take a way the phone. The purpose is to let her know you are serious the next time you threaten to take away her phone. She will no longer doubt you . It is only worth the trouble noise and disturbance if you take away again when you threaten again…. It will only be a four hour fit…. cuz she’ll know, she’s not getting it back and will give up sooner. Next time two hours, then calm and have had a good cry. Discipline is good for her. Crying and being mad is not bad! It’s only a bad thing when you take it on other people. So, be sure to talkto her directly, in her room, on the edge of the bed and almly explain the consequences if this happens again. Then she will not be surprised when you do it. Then, you take the phone when you can (don’t wrestle it away – these first 3 or 6 times)… while she’s sleeping ? Let her be shocked and amazed in the morning when she can’t find her phone. (Maybe not the first time. An’t nobody got time for that !) Horrendous horrible teenager with hormones is nothing to be trifled with! But it can be contained, muted and manipulated to your advantage. Use your punishments as rewards for yourself. TO make discipline easier. Be calm , descriptive and fore-warning. Your struggle is sticking to the plan cuz it’s complicated, difficult and exhausting…. but only for a while. It’s worth a year or two (of time put in ) to get the peace you’ll get out.

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