am I overreacting?

the wife took the teenager to Tennessee this weekend so he could meet his online girlfriend and this morning she called me and we talked for a while and she said that he had already pissed her off.

I asked what happened and she said that when she had left the hotel in the morning, maybe to go to breakfast, I didn’t ask, when she returned, the teenager and his girlfriend were just leaving so she knew that they had been in the room by themselves. He apparently told the housekeeper not to clean the room right then and she could tell that they had been in the bed. The teenager said that he had gone to the room to get another pair of pants and she obviously didn’t believe him.

I said "what are the consequences going to be?" She said "I don’t even want to think about it right now, I just want to enjoy the rest of my trip."

I told her that he probably doesn’t deserve for his girlfriend to come visit like she had talked about earlier, even if the teenager isn’t going to sleep in the same house as her when she’s here.

I understand teenage hormones and sexual desire, hell I have a way higher sex drive than the wife and it seems like the older I get, the more needs I have but that’s not the point.

They need to be responsible about things and take responsibility for their actions and that’s clearly not happening.

I wanted to tell the wife that the consequences should be that they come home a day early at least but she didn’t want to talk about it.

No wonder why no one ever listens to me around here ever. Whenever I try to suggest consequences for anything, I’m shut down by shit like that and that probably pisses me off more than the irresponsibility of the teenager.

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One thought on “am I overreacting?

  1. No, you are not over reacting. Probably under reacting since you feel like your opinion doesn’t matter. By at least stating simple facts, such as you have on your mind, like protection, responsibility, outlook and eye- on- the- future mentality for the young man, you are being a good dad! All we can do to teenagers is guide, because they are not “listening”. Surprisingly enough though, they hear us. They hear us be mean, helpful, supportive, negative or creative, in a very general sense. High above reality, “listening” to daily banter stuff, they hear our tone, our purpose and our intention. Yours is caring and you do care! Like all parents, our feelings are hurt when THEY DON’T care. But they do care if YOU care, if that makes sense. But they don’t’ care what you SAY, you know what I mean? SO say it anyway. He’ll “hear” that you care, but won’t hear what you actually say. SO just keep repeating your self … the same 5 lines you seem to have committed to memory, such as: responsibility, protection, kindness, thoughtfulness, awareness (of your future), oh! and the consequences lecture. (Which really only needs to happen once because that scars for life!) haha. It’s enough that you care and it shows when you speak up and say something . So say your “something” once in a while, every now and then and the wife will appreciate it because then she won’t feel like she is doing it by herself! You’re doing good. You’re just not being brave enough to speak up !

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